Recapping 2014: The Great & The Terrible

10:51 AM

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­Hello readers! I have been watching Korean dramas recently. I went back to watch Prosecutor Princess because it has always been my favorite Korean drama and I was feeling nostalgic. Somehow when I first watched the show, my emotions got mixed into the show as well. It has been 2 years since I last watched that show, so I thought maybe I would watch it again. Refresh my memory a little.

I did a post on recapping the year 3 years ago, and I feel like I should do something like that this year. 2014 has never been kind to me, at all. But I am still going to write about 2014 anyway.

I couldn't remember much, but I know 2014 has been quite dramatic of a year for me. To list them down in events:
  • Graduated from NYP
  • Marked a project mate down in peer evaluation form for the first (and last) time
  • Worked a full-time office job/ taste of the working world
  • Worked freelance as Blogger/ wrote advertorials from clients
  • Got into trouble with this particular BIG tech company on a blog post
  • Visited numerous cafes
  • Been through (and still going through) emotional breakdowns
  • Kicked out of the house, and survived being independent as fuck
  • Attacked by serious skin rashes
  • Tried ice-skating for the first time
  • Scalded myself on the chest with boiling ginger tea
  • Make myself my own pizza
  • Visited River Safari for the first time
  • Got invited to Fashion Beach Festival
  • Got invited to Sample Store launched
  • Visited Alive Museum and Trick Eye Museum
  • Applied for passport
  • Celebrated first Christmas family gathering

That was just a basic eventful summary of my not-so-good-but-I-have-listed-all-good-things (I tried) year. I’m going to go a little in-depth on my 2014, so to write down all the memories, and be mindful of things in my life. You can take these questions and do a little quiz for yourself too! I got them from this cute blog that I followed awhile back.

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1.    What new things did you discover about yourself?
I discovered that as long as I like someone, I don’t really care how much I feel about myself, I would always put the person’s needs first, and slowly it becomes a snowball of neglecting oneself. I also discovered that I have, from quite a social butterfly to, become an anti-social person. It is not that I want to; it’s just that I feel that it is way harder to engage in conversations with people, and having small talks with people, meeting new people and just by being in a crowded place too long irks me. My energy deplete way too fast, I get so fatigue I don’t even know how it is possible. 

I also discovered that I've become an introvert as well. Also, that I no longer wish to engage myself in any kinds of dramas. I stir away from any drama possible, from relationship to social media platforms. No longer see me engaging heat conversation online, bashing people here and there. Not sure if it’s maturity or just too chilled for bullshit. Yes, people still irks me so damn much and I discovered my tolerance level has become too low. I cannot tolerant nonsense. Any nonsense from people sets me off quickly. I snapped easily, I cried too much (be it angry, sad or disappointed), and I’d lock myself in my room away from people. Oh, and ever since my personal space was invaded for as long as I could remember, my circle of space has grown bigger. If I’m in my room, don’t come in my room. If you didn't get an invitation to my house, don’t come over or I’d not let you in.

2.   What single achievement are you most proud of?
The proudest moment in 2014 was me in my graduation robe. Yes, I finished my diploma!

3.   Which new skills did you learn?
I picked up a little on photography. Still suck at it, badly. I learned a lot from my office job as well.

4.  What, or who, are you most thankful for?
I guess this year I’m grateful for my managers, who have coached me a lot and have such great patience on me. They also shared tons of office experience and life stories to me as well. I am also grateful to that certain someone who helped me when I got kicked out the house. I am also thankful for my BFF, as my WhatsApp bitching outlet.

5.    If someone wrote a book about your life in 2014, what kind of genre would it be? Would it be a comedy, love story, drama, film noir or something else?
Tragedy- just straight up sad.

6.   What was the most important lesson you learnt in 2014?
I learned a lot in 2014, I learned that even people you love dearly can be toxic people too. I learned that personal space, self-acceptance, and self-love are important too. I also learned that sometimes once the moment is gone, it’s gone forever. I learned from someone else’s actions that there are things we can never control. I learned that I shouldn’t trust someone easily, they can hide their intention, manipulate the situation and still able to smile right at you like they know nothing. I learned that trust is important. I learned that not all good intentions end well.

7.   Which 5 people did you most enjoy spending time with?
Like I said, I spent most my time alone these days. So it’s just me, my phone, my laptop, my book and a cup of hot chocolate.

8.     How did your relationship to your family evolve?
I guess my family likes to do family drama and stuff, but as you know, I don’t fancy dramas. I usually like to keep to myself, in my own room, doing my own things. Sometimes, most of the times, well, all the times, my mom likes to invade my personal space and picks a fight with me on the most trivial stuff. I get it that my mom just needs someone to talk to, so usually I came home tired from work, but I still spent two to three hours talking to her. Been a lot of ups and downs this year, and I just hope to have lesser dramas. No mood to deal with shit in my own life, how to deal with shits around me? I’d rather focus to get my shit together, but that’s for 2015.

9.   What little things did you most enjoy during your day-to-day life?
Nothing much, but if I have to pick one- I guess traveling to and fro work alone? I like listening to music while traveling. But I don’t like traveling. Okay, I just like music.

10.  What was your most common mental state this year? (I.e. excited, curious, stressed)?
Depressed, very depressed. Tired, fatigue, stressed and anxious

11.   Was there anything you did for the very first time in your life this year?
Visited Alive Museum, Trick Eye Museum, Ice Skating, River Safari, and eat in Suki-ya.

12.  What experience would you love to do all over again?
Graduate again. But it’s for degree, duh.

13.  What do you deserve a pat on the back for?
Honestly, I think to be alive up till to date. That calls for a pat on the back; for all the dramas and bullshits I've been through this entire year, months after months. I thought I couldn't survive, with all these negative thoughts inside my head all the time as well.

14.  What activities made you lose track of time?
Internet, especially YouTube.

15.  What did you think about more than anything else?
I will go with death, negative thoughts and zombie apocalypse. Oh, and vampires too.

16.  What advice would you give your early-2014 self if you could?
There are things/ people who are toxic to you that you need to let go. Of course there will be toxic people that are harder to let go. If you tried talking to them, but they are still as toxic as before, then there is no point holding. The rose petals will fall off eventually, but the thorns will bleed you out one day too. Is the high worth the pain? Also, please don’t neglect your own needs and feelings- you keep shutting them out and putting others’ needs first, don’t do that please.

17.   Did any parts of your self or your life do a complete 180 this year?
Apart from a complete extrovert to an introvert, I don’t club anymore and become a complete home girl. 

Anyways, so it took me awhile to finish this entry. I’d already finished watching my Prosecutor Princess and cried a lot again. Anyways, I got quite mixed feelings now after researching on the main male actor in real life as I liked him a lot. Such shocking news! Anyways, moving on! I realized that I didn't do a round up for 2013, and didn't do a 2014 resolution. I guess without resolution was fine with me because 2014 has been a shitty year for me. Can you imagine if I have resolutions and goals tied to it? No thanks, I’d passed. Phew.

I honestly couldn't believe that I stayed at home for the entire week of holidays, all the way from Christmas till now. Wow, my stay-home syndrome is pretty serious.  Not sure how I am going to prepare for 2015, but I don’t pin my hopes too high. I just pray for a slower pace in life. Ha, in Singapore? Slower pace my foot! Oh well that’s life there.

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3 comments

  1. I understand that you were so proud in your graduation robe! My year was satisfying in sum, fortunately I didn't have any really huge troubles. I wish you a wonderful and happy New Year!

    xx from Germany/Bavaria, Rena
    International Giveaway: Christmas Surprise with Self Interest
    www.dressedwithsoul.com

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    1. Yes it was a proud moment. Thanks! Happy 2015 to you too! xo

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  2. I can relate to becoming less of a social butterfly and I really think it's because we've begun to grow up and mature. We don't want to deal with drama, fake people or their pretend problems, and I think that's better than being in a room of people who don't care about you. It's better to have one true person in your life than 10 who don't <3 great post, glad I found it!

    ordinarilyuirky.blogspot.ie Life and Love Advice blog. "Learn from your mistakes, or better yet, mine!"

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